|
|
Monday, August 29th, 2011
| |
10:53 am
|
|
| Friday, February 18th, 2011
| |
8:54 am - That One Time When Academy and Golden Globe Award Winning Actor Chris Cooper Tried to Kill Me...
|
cheezy christ on rye, two intense dreams two mornings in a row. what's going on with My brain this week? especially this one, particularly bloody and thematically unlike any dream I've ever had (or at least remembered).
in this one some broad and I were kind of like slaves in some walled city, and with help from moneyed people in another city we were able to make good our escape, involving a large coat and some kind of fake pass/id (multipass?) situation. anyway, we make it through the guarded gate (likely inspired by My recent jaunt through Skyharbor and Ft Lauderdale airport security) and are picked up in two separate vehicles. My ride is driven by an older fellow who looks suspiciously like Chris Cooper, and in the back seat with Me is a guy who is closer to My own age. both are wearing jackets and ties and are basically some kind of secret agent type characters. turns out they're highly trained and armed to the teeth.
so we arrive at our destination and get situated. then I guess a few days have gone by the way they do in dreams - it's just suddenly later on in the time-line. the guys and I have returned from taking care of the days business and the girl is nowhere to be found. I do discover a message from the dream's antagonist, though, in the form of an empty ammo clip laid across the rim of a water glass on the night stand. (is that from some movie or something? I get the weirdest sense of déjà vu, like I've seen it somewhere before, but if not I like the idea of that as some kind of calling card. anyways...)
so we discuss the guy who left his calling card, Chris Cooper knows him. during the tale (which in dreams is always a visual tale of course, not someone just relating something) it turns out the bad guy is also Chris Cooper. well, you know, not HIM but another dude that looks like him. and certainly not the guy who we've been palling around with. so Chris Cooper 1 heads out to work on locating the woman, while the other guy (who throughout the dream regularly alternates from being a white dude and a black dude) guns up and then we head out to make a getaway.
we head down to the parking area to gather up the car when we stumble across Chris Cooper 1's gun (complete with silencer) laying on the asphalt. this does not bode well. so I scoop up the gun, check the clip (because suddenly the former slave knows about guns, right?) and black/white dude and I duck down behind the nearest car. carefully watching through the windows I see Chris Cooper 2 approaching, and he is obviously not in the mood for fucking around. he stalks around the vehicle, knows perfectly well that we're near by. as he passes toward the back of the car, black/white dude slips around the front and creeps to the vehicle on the other side. Chris Cooper 2 realizes something just happened and wheels around, moving back to the front. with his back to Me, I raise My gun and fire directly at the back of his head.
*click, click...click*
fucking dreams: even though I had checked previously that the gun was still loaded, the clip is now inexplicably without ammo and quite useless. I duck down swiftly as he turns toward the sound My piece of shit useless weapon had made and studies the lot. I quietly shuffle toward the back of the vehicle as he moves slowly, and he begins to turn toward Me - he knows I am there and is intent on filling My face with as many bullets as are left in his weapon. waiting for My inevitable death, I resolve to not go down without a fight, and pull a knife out from shit knows where.
black/white dude still silently hiding behind the car on the other side of Chris Cooper 2 realizes I am about to die, and by way of distraction noisily drags his foot across the asphalt, making a loud scuffing sound and drawing CC2's attention. I make no hesitation, leaping up behind the assassin and dragging My blade across his throat. as blood gouts in a noisy splatter, he turns toward Me and begins to raise his gun, the sight of which motivates Me to quickly plunge the blade into and out of his left eye, like a debit card in a gasoline-pump pay slot. I gingerly pluck the gun from his hand as the life drains from him, and once he has sunk to his knees...put the gun to his head and fire off two rounds. Chris Cooper 2 slumps to the asphalt in a wet heap, no longer a danger to My friends and I.
then I woke up, an hour and a half after My alarm had gone off. easily the most violent dream I've ever had, and I've had some bloody doozies. I have no idea where it came from, but wow.
oh, and fear not - as I was waking, Chris Cooper 1 came stumbling out of the darkness, beat the hell up but otherwise still alive. don't know the ultimate fate of the girl, though...
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Thursday, February 17th, 2011
| |
8:47 am - The Day the Earth Caught Fire...
|
Man, one of those dreams you can't shake loose of, even when repeatedly being roused by the alarm. slam down on the snooze button and immediately sink back into the same scene. very strange. extremely vivid and real.
I was walking around town, and it was a very grey heavily overcast day. I eventually found Myself in some shopping plaza parking lot and realized that the overcast sky had basically become a wall of cloud smothering and blocking out My view of the city only as far away as couple blocks to the east. as I studied the strange occurrence, there suddenly came over and down the wall of grey a tide of starkly white vapor like milk being poured over a cake and I thought to Myself, "what is that, steam?!"
sure enough, within the body of the city shrouding cloud and vapor there was a growing burst of orange and purple and green flaring light, then out of the cloud shot forth 3 or 4 columns of flame, each about 30 feet in height, sliding across the lines of the city, engulfing everything in their path. stunned, I watched as they seared the environment to My left and to My right, and as the trails shot past Me to the west, I observed a repeat of the orange/purple/green light patterns within the grey veil. as before, several more jets of flame came racing westward, on different paths and as I leapt to avoid the column heading straight for My position, I scarcely made it, having been caught up in the fire briefly.
Rolling on the ground and smothering the few flames that had clung to Me, I quickly jumped up and ran for shelter, hoping desperately that I could reach safety before another wave. Dashing into the first door I came to, I found Myself in some dimly lit pizza shop, patrons pressing against the window to witness the destruction. the manager rushed to assist Me, and surveying My own damage I discovered that I had a severe burn on the shin of My right leg, but otherwise only suffered superficial fire damage. I stood and hobbled over to the window and saw emerging from the cloud a line of several monolithic beasts.
they were no less than 50 feet in stature, a dull orange in coloration like faded rust. each were four legged with humanoid torsos and arms, but heads that were not particularly human at all. where their arms met the torso there was no evidence of shoulders or neck, just a continuing lump of flesh, orange and leathery like the rest of the body. they struck Me as resembling a centauresque cross of Blaster (yes of Thunderdome fame, but minus diminutive Master) blended with a tailless brontosaurus. on the "face" of each creature there were three black gaping orifices, and two more on their chests - it was from these recesses that the flames issued.
I watched as they slowly marched across the city, repeatedly blasting and scorching the landscape, destroying everything in their path...
that wasn't the end of the dream, there was so much more, including My brother showing up. it gets all fragmented and jumbled, though. otherwise the dream was so real that when I finally woke I half expected the city to be a smoldering ruin.
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| Tuesday, December 28th, 2010
| |
11:44 pm - qichao like whoa
|
thinkin' about Amanda. I miss the crap out of her, and it is contributing to this evening's misery. in a spontaneous fit of let'strackherdownism, the glory of the internet landed Me quite swiftly on her flickr account. she is now married to a heavily bearded man and the mother of two gorgeous children. I don't know how to feel about that, but I do know I am keen on her being happy. seeing her photos, it is obvious that she is.
memory lane is kicking the shit out of Me tonight. let the past be the past, leave it where it is....
current mood:  blank
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Monday, December 27th, 2010
| |
9:59 am - lj retardation and christmas extravagance
|
what the fuck? I know I don't pop on here often anymore, and write even less...but I still like to check in with My friends and see what they've been up to. and now the last few times I've logged on, only 3 people show up on my friend updates. weird. also, it only lets me look back a few days. so what's with that?
anyways. xmas madness. My mother went bat shit banana sandwiches on xmas shopping for Me this year. she got Me a PS3, a PSP, a stack of assorted dvds, blu rays and games, and sundry other items. holy crap, woman.
yeah, I hate xmas but I love presents. and I love My mama.
;)
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| Sunday, August 29th, 2010
| |
1:31 am
|
|
| Thursday, May 20th, 2010
| |
2:51 pm - This is what happens when boredom overpowers focus at work...
|
I plan to pick up some parchment stock and print out a few nice looking copies. The watermark is My Sigil of Lucifer with Ouroboros tattoo design (with an LPD quote curving up under it).
current mood:  mischievous
|
|
(2 comments | comment on this)
|
| Sunday, May 9th, 2010
| |
3:28 pm - Brimstone Cartouche with Baphomet
|
My new tattoo, inked 05/08/10. I am so in love with it.
I have little else to say.
current mood:  pleased
|
|
(4 comments | comment on this)
|
| Monday, February 8th, 2010
| |
4:29 pm - Support's Greatest Hits Vol. VII
|
In vol. VI I'd determined that BP Support blew its load early, but magnificently. Happily, it turns out January isn't a one-and-done kind of month:
"I WILL SEE YOU FUCKERS IN FEDERAL COURT.SOME FUCKEN DRUG DEALER IS PUTING NUDE PHOTOS OF MY KID IN HIS AD AND THEN ROBS THE PEOPLE.I ALREADY TAKED TO A USA AT THE D O J.THEN I WILL SEE YOU IN STATE COURT. POSTING NUDE PHOTOS OF A 17 YR OLD IS CHILD PORN.HAVE FUN IN PRISON AND GET OUT YOUR CHECK BOOK. HEADS UP-THE D O J IDED 14 UNDER AGE GIRLS SO FAR."
ok, January is loaded, the hits just keep comin'. wow. I could not stop laughing for quite a while:
"I received this email today and the user used my REAL name. I am sending the email with this message and would like to know why and how this individual got my real name unless he hacked into my credit card information off of Backpage.com. I would appreciate your immediate attention to this matter. ATTACHED EMAIL: From: *****@hotmail.com TRESA R******- Congratulations. You have been outed as a whore. You will be on the website "Beautiful & Nasty Whores", which post the details of beautiful women, like yourself, who have been arrested on prostitution charges or outed whores who prostitutes herself on Backpage or other sites. Please e-mail nude pictures of yourself and pictures of you with a dick in your mouth yourself to *****@hotmail.com."
Rounding out the fun of January 2010, this made Me laugh quite a bit as well:
"I can buy an enslaved illegal female Mexican hooker born with balls on Backpage but I can’t sell my hot sauce who just listed w/ Dunn & Bradstreet???"
February has been fairly slow with Best Of items, but better late than never as this one slides on in with a flying kick to My funny bone:
"this is his wife and I am turning this paper in the the feds my husband has been cheatiang onme with all your whores and I don't think it is very nice I do love him and I will see you guys in dourt for allowing this his real name by the way is David P**** he lives iwth me in SouthPOrt and he works at the ******* Elementary school on ****** now if you want more he is a sex offender so go ahead and turn him in as I am turning you in if you peole have the nerve to answer the email me at ********@yahoo.com"
current mood:  amused
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Monday, January 4th, 2010
| |
8:17 pm - Support's Greatest Hits Vol. VI
|
From Dec. '09, one of the last great support emails of a terrible year:
"hey i have when to this lady and she is offer the do sexuall things in her massage and plus she does not have a licence to do this at all she is has over to give me a oral sex give me hand job for money the way that she is do alot of sexuall think and"
And 2010 hits the ground running, it seems as though no email can top this already so BP Support will be all down hill from here:
"I AM RECEIVING HARASSING MESSAGES FROM THIS USER !!!!! CAN YOU HELP ?? From: [email address] listen to us we will ruin your life as other things that will occur ,,, ask people on backpage what happened to them ,,, we are the goddess`s in other words we are considered very evil and we strive on trouble,,, the best thing for you to do is remove all of your postings ,, we are telling you ,, if you dont the evil parts of us will come out,, we have a black pimp that likes breaking bones ,,, legs,,, arms... etc.. this isnt a joke its going to be your worst nightmare.. we already been arrested we have a police record as long as a football field ,,, fenoly,, meaners,,,,we dont care ,, we are the evil twins you will ever meet ... tribal feast sisters,, we worked for you mother fucker,, we will take you down and out fast ???"
current mood:  tired
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Saturday, October 31st, 2009
| |
9:32 am
|
|
| Wednesday, October 28th, 2009
| |
10:44 am - Tamara is fucking hilarious.
|
Michael: (reading a doomed Backpage escort ad out loud) "I enjoy swollowing WHOLE C*CK! I like it rammed into my butt hole!"
Tamara: hahahah!
Michael: it's not just that she likes it put into her butt hole, she likes it RAMMED.
Jana: That makes me wanna gag.
Tamara: That makes my butthole wanna gag.
current mood: amused
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Tuesday, October 13th, 2009
| |
7:21 pm - hrmmm...
|
|
remember once upon a time when I actually used this journal, even if only for pointless and mundane horseshit? yeah, what happened?
|
|
(1 comment | comment on this)
|
| Thursday, September 24th, 2009
| |
4:20 pm - Paging Dr. DUH!
|
Kirk: What did you do to her?
Nomad: That unit is defective. Its thinking is chaotic. Absorbing it unsettled me.
Spock: That unit is a woman.
Nomad: A mass of conflicting impulses.
current mood: amused
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Saturday, August 29th, 2009
| |
6:56 am
|
|
| Thursday, August 27th, 2009
| |
1:52 pm - Support's Greatest Hits Vol. V
|
Email correspondence 08/25/09-08/27/09. This is just fantastic.
Seth: Please remove this ad asap. I can't find it in my account history. I need this off today.
Michael: [Support template detailing how to delete/edit an ad.]
Seth: Please remove this ad. Please I need it removed today . Man 2 Man Blow your Rocks off Massage. I cannot find where I posted it in my history. If you need to call me please do. I just really need the ad off to avoid some issues here.
Michael: Can you please provide a link to the ad in question? Thank you.
Seth: I have sent you guys several emails to remove this ad. For some reason its not showing up in my login history of my accounts. The ad is under Ft Lauderdale Male Escorts. It reads "Man 2 Man Blow Your Rocks Off Massage". My x is a cop and someone he knows saw the ad and I want it removed before he sees it. Do you now understand the severity of it being removed ASAP. If you need to reach me its the number on the ad Thanks, Seth
(90 minutes later)
Seth: I have asked you guys and literrally begged you to get this ad off here. I have no record of iot in my history and I'm not sure how I posted it but its my ad and it has to come off of here. MY x bf is a cop and I need this removed because a freind of his seen the ad and it has to fucking go now OK FUCKING K>> Get this Mother Fucker off of here ok, I ask you please for the past 3 days you fuckeres don't seem to get it. MY phone number and ad number is ###-###-#### Thanks fo nothing you ass FUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Michael: We've tried assisting you, only to have our emails disregarded. Now you send this? Real classy. Good luck.
current mood: amused
|
|
(2 comments | comment on this)
|
| |
11:42 am - Support's Greatest Hits Vol. IV
|
Email correspondence August 19-22. She didn't even give Me a chance to piss her off with a template, just came in guns blazing.
Carmen: Delete my fucking ad from your egly web site assholes u don't have the right to copy my pic www.carmenbanks.com
Michael: Can you please provide a link to the ad in question? Thank you.
Carmen: DeLete carmen banks pic immediately I don't want to have my pic in your garbage web site, assholes u need to respect the girls delete my fucking pic shit www.carmenbanks.com
Carmen: What, u still my pic u can't do this shit, u post in miami so u go and delete it otherwise I will post on ter to let people know
Michael: We don't post the ads, we just host them. So I ask you once again, can you please provide a link to the ad in question? Thank you.
Carmen: You fucking still my pic go make the search and delete them from your garbage miami site, why u still them fuckers
Michael: Well, you certainly can't say I didn't try to assist you, regardless of your rude and nasty disposition. If you can't be bothered to provide me with the simple information that I request in order to help, then I can't be bothered to attempt any further assistance. Have a good life.
Carmen: Why u fucking post my pic don't tell me u help asshole go fucking delete the sam way you find my pic and add them t your garbage site then go and fucking delete them. See my post on ter asshole
Carmen: Is your mother hooker asshole delete my ad you host escorts offer sex on your site , what the fuck you think are u trying to gots dick to your hooker mother, why carmen banks pic on your fucking shit miami site
Carmen: Fucking asshole go fuck your far ugly mother remove my fucking pic your garbage just like your site don't fuck with me,
Carmen: Delete my shit fuckers u still my pic why this, but your hooker mother pic on your site june 8 you copy my shit from my site I report to ter and all their members, don't fuck with me go to fuckinng miami female escorts classifieds delete
Carmen: June 8 u copy my pic you must delete my pic assholes go to fucking miami female escorts and do your fucking job don't u see no body want to got listed on your garbage site, u sale cheap sex this who u are not eros everybody love them
Carmen: Its gonna cost you big time piece a shit
current mood: amused
|
|
(3 comments | comment on this)
|
| Monday, August 3rd, 2009
| |
10:10 am - morning google talk chat at work
|
SanMiguelito: now that i have a charger, i suppose i should grow out a mullet and wear REO Speedwagon and Night Ranger t-shirts. :P
Jana: YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!
SanMiguelito: hahah
Jana: and cut the sleeves off!!!
SanMiguelito: well, duh! heh
Jana: you should make them belly shirts hahahhaa
SanMiguelito: nice. like Slater on Saved by the Bell heh
Jana: hahaha yea or the ones that have the whole sides cut out lol
SanMiguelito: wow madness hah
Jana: and your date will have to wear shirts that she cut tassles into
SanMiguelito: her hair would be all hairsprayed up and shit
Jana: feathered
SanMiguelito: hah yes Farrah Hair! even better!
Jana: and she HAS to wear reebok hightops, the puffy kind
SanMiguelito: oh, what a retro situation
Jana: and stone washed jeans with a cameltoe hahahhaa!
SanMiguelito: hahahahah
Jana: lol
current mood: amused
|
|
(comment on this)
|
| Sunday, August 2nd, 2009
| |
9:04 am - vroom vroom
|
|
| Tuesday, June 16th, 2009
| |
4:07 pm - Conversations with workmate
|
SanMiguelito: I like how in the ads for (some hooker's email), she has images with a library setting backdrop so johns will know she has a brain as well as a slutty disposition.
Zeke: haha, i hate these people
SanMiguelito: "I'm whore, but i eren't no dumb whore."
Zeke: she will read to you for extra, only Harry Potter though, heh
SanMiguelito: Hairy Pooter
Zeke: hah, funny
SanMiguelito: and the sequel, Hairy Pooter and the Chamber of Secretions. eeeeeeeeeeeeew
Zeke: you should write
SanMiguelito: hahah
Zeke: lol
SanMiguelito: Hairy Pooter and the Prisoner of AsskaBang
Zeke: haha
SanMiguelito: actually, I like "Assgangbang" better heh
Zeke: man you're bad, and funnny
SanMiguelito: hahah time to start directing my own line of porn. I'll have to come up with a great porn director name!
|
|
(comment on this)
|
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif?v=92.1){kind=small}
abyssus's journal
excited